As we came to the six-week mark of James’ passing, it seemed that life is returning to normal. I am grateful that people still ask how are you doing? While I recognise that sometimes I am not doing well, I’m grateful to be able to say, that most of the time I am doing ok. I often answer, “The time

How do you find comfort? Firstly, be with those closest to you. When we received news that we had lost our grandson, we knew we had to be with his parents, our son and his wife. I called our daughter’s husband and asked them to come and look after the grandchildren we had staying. Let some people know who can

Do you let others see when it’s tough? In May of 2019, we had a family tragedy. Our grandson James was stillborn. No cause is known, his heart just stopped beating. It was such a shock. No words. Very early on, as we started to contact people and let them know, I was faced with a choice. What would be

Do you let others see the real you? Do they know how you are really doing? One of the constant comments I get after I talk about my journey of burnout is “thank you for your transparency.” Transparency is helpful because others can get help from what you have been through. Being real and authentic is powerful. Was I always

Heading into to burnout, most areas of life were getting smaller. The emotional tank was emptying, effectiveness declining and connections were diminishing as I increasingly withdrew. But I was growing where I didn’t want to grow. I constantly felt hungry even after eating. Now I understand it was to do with emotional depletion. My body craved food because it made

Losing self-control I didn’t know that I was approaching burnout but I felt the muscle of self-control losing strength. It felt like all the fence posts and personal boundaries I had built in as a Jesus’ follower for 43 years became wobbly. Constantly I felt hungry, so I began to consume more food and gained weight. I often had a

Remember the nursery rhyme – mirror mirror on the wall…. Well the trouble is that most of us don’t see our true reflection but rather our experience is like looking at a mirror fogged by the shower. We see some shape but not the true person. Unless you realise this, you will think the foggy shape is you. Self-reflection is

How’s your ability to bounce? How is your ability to bounce back to the bumps of life? Stuck in a rut not able to do new things? Lost the ability to innovate? A few years back that was me, approaching burnout. Resilience was damaged. Damaged resilience is one of the key indicators of emotional depletion. Depletion shows in three ways;

When resilience is damaged One of the most disturbing feelings in burnout is that of numbness. Colour faded from life. Everything turned gray. It was as if the tune had become the constant hum of a sole note. I became numb to the good things of life, physically, emotionally and relationally. This made me look for greater stimulation. Nothing seemed