What Does it Mean to Sign a Mentoring/Supervising Contact?

Why is it so essential to get a signature on our contracts? It may seem like once all the information has been communicated, and all questions have been asked and answered, the important steps have already been completed. A signature could seem like an unnecessary formality between adults. I have had a few clients hesitate to sign our contracts.

Why a client may not want to sign: 

• They are afraid to commit to the time or money the sessions will require. 
• They are afraid to commit emotionally to the process. 
• They are hiding something they are afraid to disclose
• They are afraid you are not the correct fit for their needs

There are options if a client is reluctant to commit to mentorship or supervision. They could seek an informal or formal mentorship rather than a professional one. However, there are countless benefits to a professional arrangement. The commitment is essential to assuring that both mentor/mentee or supervisor/supervisee are taking the work seriously and truly looking for transformation. A contract is a commitment to accountability, which is something most of my clients actually seek. 

Identify the Clients Needs

Contracts are also built around the client’s particular needs, so if they are struggling with an element of the contract, for example, how many times they can feasibly meet a month or pay per session, the contract can be altered to fit their needs. 

Changes to the contract should be discussed thoroughly between yourself and the client. If the client is seeking changes, it could be due to unforeseen circumstances in their life. This is normal and as their mentor/supervisor, you should do what you can to adapt to their needs. 

However, if they want to change the contract and you sense it is out of discomfort emotionally, perhaps they are finding the work too difficult or are afraid of what they will have to confront about themselves… well, this is a different conversation. This could indicate they are not actually seeking real transformation and not taking the work seriously. 

The issues could also be for the mentor/supervisor. We cannot always be the right fit. There may be issues with personality compatibility. For example, they may want someone with a gentler approach or someone who is more directive. They also may be seeking help you cannot provide, such as the healing of a deep childhood trauma that requires a more specific kind of knowledge and care. 

What if the contract is broken? 

This is a fear that can affect clients and mentors/supervisors alike. We both agree to certain expectations and boundaries, trusting they will not be broken, but plenty of unforeseen events can cause changes in a person’s life. A few examples are changes in employment, health issues, the need to move houses, and difficulties in personal relationships. The client may not be able to afford the sessions if something like loss of a job happens. Personal difficulties may also distract the client from the work. You can be flexible and have a clear strategy for how to proceed. 

If there are extraneous circumstances that cause a change, that’s just how it is. Have an honest conversation about the changes, and whether or not you can continue. Sometimes, it’s okay to agree that you can’t continue at the time. You can always leave them in credit for a future time (for example, if they used six of the eight sessions) so they know they are welcome to return when the time is right. 

There are rare occasions when the boundaries might be broken in unhealthy ways, like if a client is calling you frequently during your personal time or acting abusively during sessions. This could also be a reason to break the contract. Again, though, an honest conversation should take place between you, so they understand your concern. Ultimately, a contract is in place to prevent these dangers from occurring, and if the contract is broken repeatedly, it could be a sign that they need more help than you can provide. Keeping both parties safe is the bottom line. 

Reflection Questions: 

• Why might your client be hesitant to sign a contract?
• Have you thoroughly explained the importance of a contract to your mutual safety?
• Have you provided the room for the client to ask honest questions and voice concerns?
• If the contract needs to be changed, are the reasons valid and can you afford to do so? 
• Who can you talk to if a contract is broken? 

What’s Next: Are you already an informal or formal mentor? Reflect on your competencies in the Christian Leader Mentor Assessment. https://vervelead.com/tools/#mentorq 

Limited Free Supervision Sessions Available with Intern Supervisors: Wanting supervision and finding the cost prohibitive and/or wanting to experience supervision.  Please use the form https://vervelead.com/contact/ and say you are interested in the free sessions. We will connect you with the supervisor for an introductory conversation. Note: Interns have completed training and are completing hours for registration as supervisors.