How to Track and Assess Relationships with Clients

When a mentor or professional supervisor is assessing their own work, one aspect that must be addressed is the relationship with their clients. It’s true that the technical elements of mentoring/supervising are crucial. However, without a strong and healthy relationship between mentor/supervisor and client, it is almost impossible to facilitate effective transformations. 

The relationship bond establishes trust and a safe environment. But how do you monitor and assess a relationship? How do you know you are seen as trustworthy and your client feels safe and engaged? How do you celebrate the work you have both done during your sessions and look towards your future together with hope and optimism? 

Once again, review sessions are one of the best ways to check in on the relationship.

Session Review

I like to have frequent and brief check-ins (if not every session, then every other session) to reflect on our time together that day. I always ask, “What will you take away from our session today?” followed by asking them to summarise the session in their own words. This is helpful because you can see the impact you had that day and what areas you may need to be tough on next time. If a client tells me, “I can see there are a lot of emotions deep in my frustrations… I will make some time to reflect on these feelings that I’ve now identified,” that is a good outcome! I was able to help them recognise some new emotions and begin the process of reflection. 

Midway Review 

About halfway through our time together, I like to have a midway review. If there are eight sessions planned, this comes after the fourth one, or if the sessions are open, then it could be every six months or so. The important thing here is that it takes several sessions to see any sense of progress or behaviour patterns, and there still needs to be time after the review to adjust for the most effective transformation possible.

During these reviews, I like to ask about the tangible benefit of our time together. This is not because I feel insecure or I want the client to sing my praises, but because this is an effective way to look at the growth that has been made and to honour the work that we’ve done together.

I might ask, “If you had continued with the status quo of your life and with God, without this time dedicated to transformation, where would this have taken you?” One client told me, “Spending time fixing my marriage has been so beneficial; the future is bright, and I feel like we will grow old together.” Then, I asked about the intangible benefits. “Well,” he said, “this has also made it safer for the people I minister to; the vitality that I experience from a thriving relationship has helped my extended relationships and to make a difference in both these worlds.” 

Annual Review

The annual review is perhaps the most essential. This is where contracts are revisited, the entire year is reflected on and the future of your time together is considered. To reflect, I like to ask these questions of my clients: 

• What has been helpful in the sessions?
• What have you discovered?
• Where have you experienced transformation?
• How is our relationship working for you? 
• What goals/struggles would you like to address next? 

While this review can be difficult, you need to be able to see if this relationship is working. Have the sessions gone stale? Are you too comfortable? Possibly, out of your depth? Are you the right person to work with your client? Even if your client has seen growth and trusts you, there may be occasions when you will have to recommend another professional for the next step of their journey. 

Additional Reflection Questions for Clients 

• Are you willing to recommend mentoring/professional supervision to others? (This shows their satisfaction with the work you both have done and their commitment to encouraging others to focus on their health and well-being.) 

• Who would benefit from a relationship like this? Are you willing to talk to them about this? (There is still some negative stigma attached to seeking professional help in our society. It is good to normalise getting help and for your client to offer this help to others.)